i like him a lot
and we were suppose to hang out friday :0(
i had the car all night
and im a dumbass and didnt even think of him until like 4 in the morning
then he says we can hang out but i was too tired
BUT i did ask happy where he was...AND HAPPY SAID HE WAS WITH HIS EX FIANCEE
wtf
WHAT THE FUCK
every time id ask where richard was theyd say he was with his girlfriend
now i bet eveytime i ask where sean is theyll say hes with his ex fiancee
WHAT THE FUCK AGAIN
i cant believe he was engaged
wow
i keep looking up information on leos haha i get so obsessed
i fucked up and hooked up with nate friday
i hope he doesnt hear about it
gosh
im sad
today at church during bible study we talked about relationships the entire time and sex before marriage and WOW it was so uncomfortable lol
i havent had sex in like...7 months
omg i like him so much its ridiculous i dont know what to do
fuckin aaron took my car while i was passed out
haha friday was so fucked up
we got a bottle and i took like 5 shots in 10 minutes
then i fuckin drive to this party drunk as fuck and take 3 more shots
then i remember going into some room with nate and we started making out...anthen i remember being at trevors house in bed with nate still HAHAHA WHAT THE FUCK
and when i wake up we dont know where my car, phone, or purse is
it really wasnt that much fun...
i dont have fun anymore
and fuckin hang overs ugh
i bet if we were with sean it would have been fun
seanseansean
ugh ugh ughuguggughuhgugugugguhghughughuguugghuguguughguggugugu
what am i doing
shouldnt i be texting him and being flirty
instead of just waiting for him to text me and he probably wont
why do ido this why dont i be a big girl and fuckin go talk to him
im stupid
i said i needed a girlfriend
and he said he did too
and all i said was "lol"
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME
WHY CANT I BE CUTE AND FLIRTY AND HINT THAT UHHHHH YEAH GO OUT WITH ME DUH
OH MAN
but now i feel like im being desperate...ew
he told me to hit him up last night
and i did
and it took him a whole hour to text me back
WHAT THE HELL hahahaa oh man...
i shouldnt have to wait an hour...he should be on that shit
im really scared he heard about nate...BUT THAT SHOULDNT EVEN MATTER BECAUSE IM NOT WITH HIM why am i freaking out
i think he lost interest.omg
A FIANCEE
now im gonna do what i always do
and just not talk toh im at all or text him at all
WHY
and wait for him to do something
which i dont know will happen for sure
and if it doesnt...WELP GUESS I GOTTA WAIT UNTIL I JUST BUMP INTO HIM AT SOME RANDOM PARTY
im fuckin crazy